RELIGION

The Hat Pin

"We have a problem. My wife keeps falling asleep during your sermons. It's very embarrassing, not to mention disrespectful. What can I do?"

"I've noticed this and have an idea if you're up to the task," said Father, "Take this hat pin with you. I can see when Mrs. Jones is sleeping, and I will motion to you. When I motion, you give her a good poke in the leg with the hat pin.

In church the following Sunday, Mrs.. Jones dozed off. Noticing this, the priest put his plan to work. "And who made the ultimate sacrifice for you?" he said nodding to Mr. Jones.

"Jesus!" Mrs. Jones cried out as her husband jabbed her in the leg with the sharp hat pin. "Yes! You are correct, Mrs. Jones!" came the father's quick reply.

Mrs. Jones then turned and glared angrily at her husband.

Soon, Mrs. Jones again nodded off, father noticed. "Who is your redeemer?" he asked the congregation, motioning toward Mr. Jones.

"My God!", howled Mrs. Jones as she was stuck again with the pin.

"Right again!", bellowed father, a slight grin on his face.

Mrs. Jones again gave her husband a real hard threatening glare.

Before long, though, she again nodded off. This time however, father did not notice. As he picked up the tempo of his sermon, he made a few hand gestures that Mr. Jones mistook as signals to sharply poke his wife with the hat pin again.

Father asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore him his 99th son?"

Mrs. Jones jumped up and shouted, "You stick that thing in me one more time and I'll break it in half and shove it where the sun don't shine!"

"Amen!" replied all the women in the congregation.